Lessons Learned 2012

Sometimes it pays to look before you leap. This does not apply to bungee jumping but is definitely relevant in a number of other situations (goal for next year- improve my ability to determine when this rule applies. )

(even if he loved me first, and even if he says all the right things and makes me believe we will be together forever) Never, ever let another girl’s boyfriend in to my heart (or other places.)

I actually decide what I am going to hang on to and carry with me. Fate does not decide what I will and will not get over. I get to decide how I am going to feel each day. I decide what I am going to let influence my life. I have so much power to affect my life. who knew?

Homesickness kicks in around 3 months. Having family visit during this time exacerbates the feeling. Reaching out to friends where you are, fixes it.

Be my own best friend, partner, caregiver and strongest supporter first.

Coming home is anti-climactic;

And leaving isn’t always the best answer.

Embrace where you are, who knows when you will be there again.

There is stillness and peace in breathing- if you care enough to find it.

Working out for the sake of working out is kind of futile. Doing something I love, which is also a workout, yields amazing results.

I am more than my worst mistakes.

Sometimes, it takes everything blowing up and falling apart before you can build something new.

Working hard is not only rewarding financially, it can be an emotionally enriching experience.

I don’t have to have it all figured out. I can kind of have it figured out, I can work towards having it figured out, I can figure some stuff out. I may some day know what it is. And, I am okay with that.

It is better to be alone than it is to be with someone who makes you feel lonely.

The future isn’t something that happens one day, it is the culmination of a series of decisions and events. What I do or don’t do now is hugely relevant to what my future will or will not be.

__________________________________________________________ I have so much left to learn.


How I ended up lost.

2012 is a great year. It is the year of risk, change, being happy, just being, finding passion and defining dreams.

2011 was a tumultuous year for me. I should have known it was going to be that way when things just did not go right from the very beginning. It all started on New Years Eve when, after promising myself that I would not get black out drunk and make a fool of myself AGAIN this year, I got black out drunk and made a fool of myself. It was the beginning of the end of what was supposed to have been a very good year.

Over the next few months, life continued downhill at a fairly steady rate. Highlights of this time included sending a drunken email to my boss, crying in a friend’s hallway while she was having a party inside her apartment, drunkenly trying to convince someone that he loved me when the opposite was quite obvious and drinking myself into a stupor every weekend.

Though I loved the company I worked for, it was an ill-suited match and I was struggling to keep up. With the help of a fantastic boss, I began a journey of self-discovery and personal development. I took baby steps for a very long time and savoured every moment of development as I experienced it. Eventually, and for reasons that are for now an embarrassing secret, I decided to leave the company and move to Seoul to teach English.

Here I am, in Seoul. Everyday I discover a little more of who I am and what makes me happy. This is where I will share that with you.